Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
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