Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
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