okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
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