ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
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