There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
