It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize