If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
Randomize
