we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
Randomize
