She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
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