I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
They have beer where we have blood.
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
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