Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
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