WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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