think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
