Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
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