We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
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