All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
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