I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Randomize
