He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
im holly from the hills drunk
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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