you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Randomize