Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
Randomize