Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
Little spoons don't ask big questions
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize
