this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
Randomize
