This dress was meant to end up on your floor
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
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