You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Randomize
