She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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