You really coming over, don't trick.
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
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