i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
