white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
My boss' voice literally gives me gas
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
they're like a gay fantastic four
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
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