i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
