North Korea, Best Korea!
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Randomize
