Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Randomize
