no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
