i can't believe i had my finger in that
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
