Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
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