Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
