saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
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