I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
Randomize
