Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
