You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
