Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize