Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
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