omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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