obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
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