You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Randomize