therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
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