he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
