Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
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