is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
Randomize