Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize
