He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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